Divorce for Men: Tips and Guides for Men About Divorce

Divorce for Men: Tips and Guides for Men About Divorce

What is divorce for men like? What are a man’s rights in a divorce? Should men file for divorce first? How should a man prepare for divorce? Is divorce fair for men? What are the major concerns for men when divorcing? What is the difference between divorce and separation? How does divorce affect a man’s life? This article has answers to these and more questions about divorce.

Hi. My name is Sean Galla, and I am a facilitator for online support groups for men, including divorce groups. My work involves creating safe spaces where men can come together to share, learn and talk about different issues that affect men, including divorce for men. I have been working with men for more than 11 years and know firsthand how important it is for men to understand divorce, how it is likely to affect dad’s lives, and why having a support system is vital throughout this journey. In this article, I will answer all the questions you have about divorce for men and give actionable tips and helpful advice on how to navigate life after divorce as a man.

Written by

Sean Galla

An experienced facilitator, community builder and Peer Support Specialist, Sean has been running men's groups for 10+ years. Read Sean's Full Author Bio.

Why Divorce Hits Men Hard

Why Divorce Hits Men Hard

A common statement made after divorce is that the standard of living of the ex-wife goes down while that of the man goes up. Even though this is not universally true, it often is the case. It has helped to perpetuate the stereotype that men become carless after a divorce and throw money around as they try to prove that they are enjoying their newly found freedom.

However, just because some men get a little financial leverage after divorce does not mean that the divorce process was easy or good for them. According to studies, living up to the stereotype of the carefree newly divorced man is often used to disguise the suffering and emotional turmoil they may be experiencing after the divorce. Men prefer to pretend that their life is moving on instead of dealing with the stress that follows a divorce.

While it is false to claim that divorce always affects men more than women, the process is often more stressful to the man than to the woman.

If you’re looking for information on Life After Divorce for Men, follow mensgroup.com now.

The Grieving Process

Most people think of grief as something only experienced in the case of loss through death. However, the grief process can occur when there is any form of loss, including the loss of a marriage. When a man loses their spouse to divorce, they are expected to live up to the stereotype or move on fast, which gets in the way of the natural and essential process of grieving.

Most of the time, the best divorce advice a man is given is to get out there, which shames him for wanting to grieve the loss and instead forces him to man up and move on. Trying to get over grief prematurely will manifest in other self-destructive ways, such as self-medication with substances, alcohol abuse, anger, and even risky sexual behavior.   

Also, women have stronger social connections, making it easier to talk to close friends and family members about their emotional struggles through the divorce process. On the other hand, men lack a support system they can go to for help and advice through the divorce process, making it even harder on them since they have to shoulder the stress on their own.

Is Life Better After Divorce for Men?

There are no right or wrong answers to this question. While some men may feel free and liberated from years of marriage turmoil, others can suffer a devastating blow they find hard to recover from. It is normal for things to get tough after a divorce. You can take steps during the divorce process and after to make it easier on yourself.

Tips to Prepare for Divorce for Men

Tips to Prepare for Divorce for Men

Plan

planning is one of the most important divorce tips. To ensure you are not met with surprises during the divorce process, you must prepare adequately for it. Ensuring you consider all important aspects and decisions can make the process easier and less stressful.

Some of the points you need to consider during the planning process include:

  • Understanding the divorce process in your state
  • Learning and finding legal advice help in your state
  • Organizing finances for spousal support, child support, and lawyer
  • Choosing an experienced family law firm, family law divorce attorney, or divorce lawyer to help through the family court or divorce proceedings
  • Understanding the attorney-client relationship
  • Making active participation through the divorce negotiations
  • Turning off your emotion through the litigation process
  • Seeing a divorce therapist or counselor manage your emotions after divorce better
  • Understanding child custody, fathers’ rights, and men’s rights after divorce
  • Focusing on the possibility of being happy again after divorce

These are important factors to consider as you plan to go through the divorce process. Planning for divorce makes it easier for you to make informed decisions during the process.

Avoid trying to solve the issue by yourself

When faced with divorce, it is natural for you to want to make concrete plans for the future to maintain control over your life. However, the divorce process is not one to go through on your own. Matters related to alimony, child custody, child support, who gets your marital home, and equitable distribution of marital property are best handled by a divorce law office. They have the experience and knowledge to ensure ex-spouses do not get the raw end of the deal.

You might want to read our article How to Save a Relationship and follow mensgroup.com.

Consider mediation before going to court

Settling a divorce in family court can be draining and time-consuming. If the divorce is amicable, you should consider meditation. The mediation process allows you to end the marriage and file the papers in less time, with less stress and lower costs than contested divorce cases.

If your soon-to-be ex-wife is willing to mediate, you can choose a mediator together to find the perfect person to work with both of you as you settle your divorce. If your spouse is reluctant to go through mediations, you need to hire an attorney with experience in collaborative divorce, as this will reduce the need for a full-blown court litigation process.

Engage in fair divorce negotiations

While it may seem like so often, divorce does not always have to be a battle. If you turn a divorce process into a battle, you will spend years in family court before you can complete the process, which becomes expensive, ruins relationships, and ruins the children’s lives. Engaging in good faith negotiations ensures you move past the divorce process quickly.

Remember your divorce is a business negotiation

When you want to negotiate a business deal, you do not let your emotions cloud your judgment. The same mindset should be used when going through a divorce issue. This will ensure a fair settlement based on the data and circumstances in place.

Do not move money or hide assets

If you were the breadwinner in your marriage, it might be tempting to hide away some money or assets to ensure you do not lose too much in the divorce. While this may seem like an ideal way to protect what’s yours, it is a bad idea. Family law attorneys know all the tricks people play during divorce and will work to unearth your habit and use it against you.

Make your children the priority

If you had kids in your marriage, co-parenting with your former spouse would be part of the family law matters discussed in your divorce. Ensure you make them a priority in the process by ensuring they know you are always a phone call away, having a comfortable place to sleep when they come to visit your new house, and spending quality time with them even during the divorce process. By prioritizing parenting time, it will be easier to find a settlement in their best interest.

Allow yourself to grieve

Instead of manning up and moving on, it is healthy to allow yourself to go through the grief process after divorce. It is normal to feel sad, lonely, depressed, and angry after a divorce. Take time to acknowledge that things are not right and remember that these feelings are temporary.

If you’re looking for information on Dating After Divorce, follow mensgroup.com now.

Reach out to other men who have undergone a divorce

It is essential to have a supportive network around you when going through a divorce and after a divorce. Attending meetups with other men going through the same issues can be a good way to learn more about the divorce process and have a network of friends you can talk to without shame.

Divorce support groups for men are support forums designed to cater to men going through a divorce or newly single men who have recently undergone a divorce. In these groups, men meet to discuss and support each other while offering helpful divorce for men advice to make life after divorce easier. MensGroup is a leading online support group for men that hosts sessions for divorced men.

You might want to read our article Divorce Recovery and follow mensgroup.com.

Information About MensGroup

MensGroup

Men’s Group is an online support platform for men with the primary goal of creating a positive community for men. Here, men can talk about anything they are going through instead of bottling up their emotions, including divorce. You can also find helpful advice on family law, divorce for men, and even child custody.

During the MensGroup divorce support group meetup, you virtually chat with other group members going through something similar and get divorce recovery help. These online meetings are cost-effective and have been proven effective. Joining MensGroup is your best chance to handle divorce positively and hope for a happier, more fulfilling life, even after divorce.

The Bottom Line

Divorce for men can be tasking, both emotionally and financially. Learning how to navigate life during the divorce is ideal to ensure you do not lose yourself. It is possible to find happiness again after a divorce. This article highlights helpful tips to help men survive divorce. Joining a support group like MensGroup can help you find legal guidance, emotional help, or advice on starting a new life or relationship after divorce.

*Sources:
1. 8 financial tips for men getting a divorce
2. Divorce Checklist: 10 Things Every Man Should Do
3. How to Cope with Divorce as a Man
4. 15 Men Reveal the Moment They Knew They Wanted a Divorce
5. The 3 Worst Mistakes Men Make in Divorce

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