Are you looking for sexless marriage advice for men? Are you a man stuck in a sexless marriage? Are you looking for solutions to your sexless marriage? Are you looking for ways to rekindle sexual intimacy in your marriage? If you answered yes to any of these questions, you have come to the right place.
Hi. My name is Sean Galla. I have been facilitating online support groups, including sexless marriage support groups, for more than 10 years. In my years of work, I have seen how lack of intimacy in a marriage can negatively affect the man and the relationship in general. If you are a man stuck in a sexless marriage, finding reliable advice and information is the best way to find healing and learn how to overcome this difficult hurdle. Here is everything you need to know about sexless marriages and what you can do for your relationship to thrive again.
In this article, I will give solid sexless marriage advice for men based on my years of experience helping men in your situation. Whether you are looking for guidance or professional help, this article has everything you need to know.
Table of Contents:
Sex and Intimacy in Marriage
In any happy marriage, sex is the highest point of physical intimacy shared by two people. When two people are getting to know one another, sex is usually not a problem, even amongst newlyweds. However, as you settle into your married life routine, sometimes sex can cease to happen as often as it did in earlier years. Lack of sex can strain a relationship, especially when one person is interested and the other is never in the mood.
A sexless marriage can be any married couple with little to no sexual activity between them.
For most men, being stuck in a sexless marriage can be stressful and frustrating, leading to bad habits like cheating. Going through a sexless marriage phase is both terrifying and worrisome. It is easy to assume that your wife no longer finds you attractive or that she is seeing other people, which can create trust issues in the relationship. This is why sexless marriage effects on men are more significant than on women.
Lack of sex is a common problem in most marriages.
According to recent research, at least 16% of the couples participating in the survey said they were stuck in sexless marriages. Whatever reasons forced sex to take a back seat in the relationship, one common aspect amongst all participants is that the men found it frustrating and blamed most of their marital issues on the lack of sex.
While common, sexless marriages are not healthy. Lack of sex in relationships can lead to numerous issues such as communication breakdown, unhappiness in the relationship, and stability issues.
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Factors that Contribute to a Sexless Marriage
To be able to solve a problem, it is important to first get to the root of it. Why does a marriage that was once full of intimacy suddenly turn into a sexless marriage?
Some common reasons for lack of sex in a marriage include:
Unresolved conflicts and resentment
As it is often said, familiarity breeds contempt. If your marriage suddenly feels like a contact battlefield, this may be the reason you are not having sex. Verbal, psychological, or physical abuse can also lead to a sexless marriage. When conflicts are left unresolved, it often causes resentment for one another, which affects sex drive.
A growing family
When you got married, it was always you and your spouse against the world. This made it easy for you to get your sexy groove on at any time. However, as your family grows and you become parents, you naturally shift focus from one another to your growing family and meeting the demands of raising children. Without being deliberate about creating time for one another, you soon find yourself in a sexless relationship.
If you are a married man, you might want to read our article How to Stop Arguing with Your Wife.
Unmet sexual expectations
If one person in the relationship is the only one getting their sexual needs met, it is natural for the other to seem withdrawn or uninterested. When sexual needs are not met, the affected individual anticipates future sexual encounters negatively, making it hard for them to get in the mood or desire sex.
Reduced sex drive
If you as a man feel that you are not getting as much sex from your wife as before, it is probably because her sex drive has dropped. For women, a lot of factors can contribute to low libido, including physical health issues, mental health issues, and environmental changes. Some of the most common causes include menopause, hormonal changes, overwhelming day-to-day activities, a new baby, or a medical condition.
Once you have been married for a while, you and your wife settle into a routine. You are always spending free time together, which can breed complacency. It is easy to start seeing your spouse as a roommate, and settling into this routine without actively spicing up your sex life can sometimes affect your sexual desire for one another and cause a dry spell.
Lack of attraction
Sometimes, couples grow out of love for one another or lose interest in one another. Lack of love can affect the sex drive in the relationship.
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Side Effects of a Sexless Marriage Amongst Men
As it is often said, men are naturally physical beings. This makes sex an important aspect of any man’s life and sexual relationship, as men go into marriages hoping that they get to enjoy a long, happy marriage characterized by great sexual experiences.
According to research, sexual satisfaction and marital satisfaction go hand in hand where men are concerned. This is why lack of sex in a marriage often leaves men feeling like they are in a failed marriage.
Lack of sex in a marriage can have negative effects on men.
When a wife continuously rejects sexual advances from their husband, the men are left feeling rejected, affecting their self-esteem and mental health. Over time, these issues can develop into depression, anxiety, and stress.
When a man’s sexual needs are not met at home, it is common for some men to seek satisfaction outside of their marriage. Apart from the sexual aspect, men get into affairs to assert themselves as men and massage their egos.
A marriage with no sex can leave a man feeling unattractive, which affects their self-esteem. Most men feel insecure about their sexuality, develop negative body image and pick up unhealthy habits.
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When a man feels stuck in a sexless marriage, it is normal for them to develop anger issues as a natural response to the frustration they are going through. This leads to more fighting in the relationship, often making the relationship problems worse.
Lack of trust
It is normal for a man to develop trust issues in a marriage if the wife seems less interested in sex. Lack of trust can cause many control issues and fights in a relationship, which does not help to get to the root of the problem. It is common for you to think your partner is having their sexual needs met outside of your union.
Reduced emotional connection
Lack of sex in a marriage will have a negative effect on your emotional connection. When you fail to have physical intimacy for a long time, you become cold, distant, and uninterested in your spouse. This is because you are experiencing a lack of emotional connection to her because of the lack of intimacy.
When lack of sex in a marriage is not addressed at a good time, it is common for men to want to walk away as a way of correcting the sexual dysfunction in their marriage. Men feel that a marriage cannot function without sexual intimacy and thus choose to leave the relationship.
Sexless Marriage Advice for Men – How to Fix a Sexless Marriage
If you are a man stuck in a sexless marriage but want to fix the issue, there are different ways to go about the issue.
Start talking about the problem
The most essential sexless marriage advice for men you can get is to start talking about the sexual problems in your marriage. If you notice that intimacy is lacking in your relationship, you need to be able to speak to your spouse about it. The chances are that your spouse has also noticed the problem but doesn’t know how to bring it up.
Before you make any drastic decisions, talk to your spouse about it. Once you both agree that there is a problem, you can plan how to fix it.
When talking to your partner about the issue, it is important to ensure you do not throw the blame on her. Take turns expressing yourself and validating each other’s feelings. sometimes, seeing a sex therapist can help restore healthy intimacy communication.
Decide on the way forward
If you have been in a sexless marriage for long, you have probably thought about different solutions. The two of you need to agree on a way forward. If both of you want to save the relationship, you need to consider seeking therapy or finding ways to rekindle the romance in your relationship. If you feel that the marriage has run its course, you can both agree to end it amicably.
Whatever decision you make, you need to ensure it is the most rational one for the two of you.
Understand each other’s sexual needs
As you grow older, sexual needs change, leading to reduced sex drive because one feels misunderstood since their idea of good sex has changed.
When trying to rekindle the sexual romance in your marriage, it is important to take the time to learn what your spouse prefers and what they no longer like to make them interested in sex again. This goes back to communicating your needs to your spouse. You also need to tell them when you are stressed or worried. By addressing these underlying issues and understanding their sexual needs, you are both guaranteed satisfaction in the bedroom.
If you have not had sex with your spouse for a while, it may take time to get back to the passionate and intense routine you were once used to. It is important to remain patient through the process and get to know your wife anew to know what works for her and what doesn’t. take her out for date night, pamper her, and do all the things that need to be done to get back your healthy sex life. Giving it time and trying different things in the bedroom will eventually get you where you want to be.
Join a sexless marriage support group
While working on your low sex drive issues privately may be a good idea, sometimes talking to a third party that understands can make the difference in your relationship and help you find long-term solutions. Apart from seeing a marriage counselor or going for marriage counseling, support groups are also important.
Sexless marriage support groups and forums like mensgroup.com are safe spaces where men in sexless marriages meet other men who have been in sexless marriages for encouragement, support, and help.
You get to meet with people who have been in similar situations and can thus offer guidance and advice from their personal experiences. While talking about your marital sexual frustrations can be frustrating and humiliating, a support group made up of people who have been in your shoes makes it easier for you to get the help you need. Being part of a support group will give you the mental clarity you need to make the right decision for your marriage and enjoy your sex life again.
Men’s Group Sexless Marriage Support Group
If you are a man looking for an all-male sexless marriage support group online, Men’s Group is the best place to be. Like women, men too can be on the receiving end of a sexless marriage. Having a space where you can talk to fellow men in confidence and privacy is all the help you need to spice up your marriage again.
Mensgroup.com is an online-based support group that ensures you can get help as a man. On this men-only site, you will meet other men who have been in sexless marriages and managed to overcome the challenge. You will get helpful sexless marriage advice for men, including how you can enjoy sex again and get your wife sexually interested in you again. If you are a man in a sexless marriage, you are not alone. Mensgroup.com is a free space to share, learn, and grow.
Being in a sexless marriage can be frustrating for any man. If you want your relationship to work and your marriage to last, seeking help is the best decision for your relationship. If you are a man looking for sexless marriage advice for men, mensgroup.com is the perfect place to get the guidance, feedback, and support you need from fellow men who want to see you thrive and enjoy a happy marriage.
*Sources: 1. Sexless Marriage Reasons and Remedies 2. When the Cause of a Sexless Relationship Is — Surprise! — the Man 3. 25 Ways to Fix a Sexless Marriage 4. When to Walk Away From a Sexless Marriage 5. How to Move Forward When You're in a Sexless Marriage